Being a step mum

I rarely talk about my life as a step mum. Rhys features heavily on my vlogs, blog and social media but it’s not often (in fact I’m not sure ever) that I’ve spoken about my role in his life.

It’s not at all because I don’t want to talk about it; it’s not an awkward topic or somewhere I need to tread carefully; it’s simply that I’ve been too busy being his step mum to really think about what it means to me.

I’ve had loads of questions though, people often ask me about my role, how I feel about it, what our relationship is like, does it come naturally … the list goes on. I decided to do a chatty vlog last week to give an overview and I’m so glad that I did it. I got a fab response from what was a really open and honest video. I was so pleased to not only hear from step parents alike but from step children and parents who have remarried and now have step parents for their children.

A few people told me they had wanted to ask and know more but didn’t want to pry and I really wish they hadn’t felt like that.ย Sharing mine and my families lives with you all through my blog and vlog means I’m opening our doors and letting you all in. Of course privacy is important but I don’t want to keep secrets, I want to be open and honest especially as I do this all for Jasper. I started this blog and have continued to blog and vlog so that Jasper can have his whole life documented; he can see how him and Rhys wrestle and play fight and how me and his daddy still make time for date nights amongst the sleepless nights and daddy working away. I feel a kind of obligation to him and also to you guys to be an open book and I really want you all to be able to ask questions and find out more about us. I say obligation but it’s completely voluntary, I want to be an open book, maybe it’s a need?

So with that in mind, I’m going to film a ‘Step mum Q&A’. I did a general Q&A a while back and loved answering all of your questions, so I thought why not do one again, but this time a little more specific. If you’d like to know anything about my role as a step mum, mine and Rhys’s relationship, our family dynamic, our routine etc then please pop a question in the comments below. Alternatively you can email me, send me a message on Facebook, tweet me, post on instagram – however you want. I’ll probably give it a week and if I get at least 5 questions I’ll go ahead and film my answers ๐Ÿ™‚

If you have any general questions send them over too and I’ll film a general Q&A at a later date ๐Ÿ™‚

Here’s the video I filmed last week – I hope you like it and you do please don’t forget to give it a thumbs up and subscribe <3

Thanks for reading/watching guys!

Jess x


  • Hana Venn
    28th September 2015 at 8:44 am Reply

    I love this! With Matt having his two boys who were 4 and 8 when I met them, it’s quite a different senario but I completely get where you’re coming from with the emotion side of it! Well done for being so honest and open, hats off to you!

    • Jessica
      29th September 2015 at 8:49 am Reply

      Was it really tough with them understanding everything at that age? I found with Rhys being so young he didn’t know any different which made it easier in some ways. Do they live with you guys? If you have any questions please do ask as I’m filming a Q&A next week on the subject and so far have no questions to answer haha

      • Hana
        29th September 2015 at 8:56 am Reply

        The youngest has never known them together so he’s pretty laid back about it, but two years down the line the eldest (now 10) still has to talk things over sometimes. We have them Wednesdays and most weekends, so I’m really lucky that Matt and I still get our own time, as well as family time. Questions….hummm….How do the boys manage when Rhys goes to his mums? How does Christmas work with the boys? (this is a current issue in our house! We are going to recreate Christmas day on Boxing Day!) Hope this helps!! x

        • Jessica
          2nd October 2015 at 2:51 pm Reply

          That’s the same with Rhys that he’s never known them together and I definitely think that makes it easier on them. Me and Pete try and make time for us, I went up and stayed with him this week in Cheshire and had spa time and it was heaven!

          Fab thanks lovely! I’ll be uploading the video next week with answers so keep an eye out ๐Ÿ™‚

  • Hannah - Budding Smiles
    28th September 2015 at 1:08 pm Reply

    Oh god Jess I got emotional when you started talking about what if something happened to Pete and would you still see Rhys! You seem like such a lovely lady and both boys (and Pete!) are lucky to have such a loving person in their lives. I’m technically a step-mum but totally different circumstances so I can’t imagine having a step child close in age to my own because my step son is a lot older xx

    • Jessica
      29th September 2015 at 8:47 am Reply

      Aww I never knew you were a step mum too, does your step son live with you? Thanks lovely, it’s such a tricky situation sometimes but it does work really well ๐Ÿ™‚

      If you have any questions please do ask, I’m planning a Q&A for next week about it but so far have no questions haha

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Hi I’m Jess, Single Mum, Accredited Life Coach, NLP Practitioner and Beauty Business owner.

I chat about all thing female empowerment, spirituality and positivity